A Lakota elder joked to me one time that he felt the reason his people had so many problems with their young men was because nobody let them steal horses any more. Stealing horses in the horse culture of the Plains was a time honored way for young men to prove their merit. Few died in those escapades and it gave young men a chance to practice all of their warrior skills. Of course these days, the ranchers in South Dakota would most likely frown upon young Lakota warriors stealing their horses, I still believe the spirit of the idea could be entertained.
It is with these stories and traditions in mind that I approach the young men in my Yoga Calm classes. I understand and appreciate their need to be young warriors. Sometimes when I introduce myself at conferences I tell people I am a reluctant pacifist. I am a warrior. My true nature is to be a warrior and defend the village, the tribe, the school, the nation from threats. These days I have different battles to fight: addiction, indifference, apathy, abuse, sloth. The battles have changed but the role of the warrior remains the same.
Young men and boys are no different. The warrior instinct lies deep in their bones. The desire to be strong, competent, fierce and protective at the same time runs through the DNA of all males. Getting these boys to do yoga requires a different strategy than the contemporary “Yoga Journal” image of super slim scantily 20 somethings in difficult and advanced poses.
Adults beginning a yoga practice are generally motivated by a need to seek relief from pain, spiritual aspirations, the desire to be fit and easing depression, arthritis and other maladies. Boys have different motivations and much of their motivation comes from the conscious and sometimes latent warrior instinct.
A majority of the youth in the rural, isolated Eastern Washington communities involve themselves in sports. I tell the boy and girl athletes that practicing yoga will make them better athletes. Depending on my audience, expound upon the ability a person can develop during yoga practice to see everything at once, to slow things down internally when everything is happening very fast around them. In a rapidly paced always moving sport like basketball this is indeed a valuable skill to master.
Rebellion and autonomy are primary needs of young men. Rather than trying to quash this trait I talk about the need to channel it. I introduce them to the idea of intelligent rebellion. There are many fine causes to rebel about; bullying, obesity, addiction, mental slavery from the media and other injustices. And I often remind that self destruction is not rebellion.
During the actual physical practice I take the time to point out that the Warrior poses can actually appear to be a martial form of yoga. I introduce them to concept s than Dan Millman articulated so well in his seminal work “The Way of the Peaceful Warrior.”
Perhaps much of my approach to yoga comes from my personal philosophy in which I so strongly identified with the Peaceful Warrior archetype. The boys know I will stand behind them in all sorts of situations. They know that I stand up for what I believe in and say what needs to be said and practice stillness when that is called for.
One of my favorite and most popular wind down activities is getting the boys to sit in a circle and share “scar stories.” All boys and indeed all girls have some scars just from being on the planet. I allow enough time for each student to share a story about a scar they have. If it is in an appropriate place, I let them show the group. This is akin to a “red badge of courage.” It lends validity to their adventurousness. Every boy has a scar that comes with being young and foolish. It is the joy of being young and foolish that makes them boys.
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