Put Up Poker

Put downs are an insidious part of the American cultural landscape. This verbal behavior becomes compounded in the school environment with its "herd" problems (many people in a confined space competing for limited resources). It looks like this:

• A hierarchical system by design of winners and losers
• Incomplete brain development of most of the residents (specifically the cerebral cortex)
• Basics of child and adolescent development including experimentation with everything from substances to identities
• Ancient biological drives
• The predominance of the amygdala (reptilian core) in many decisions
• A media (Sponge Bob) which reinforces verbal put downs as a cultural norm

Classroom teachers have a variety of responses to this. Some just get numbed into submission until they finally just tune it out or don't hear it anymore. Others deal with it head on in a variety of ways. Some use the traditional crime and punishment model and just send frequent offenders to the office or have them do detention. The more consciously aware teachers use the prevalence of put downs as teachable moments or even take class periods to address bullying on all levels.

A proactive response is set the stage before the stage sets you...and your class...on fire. One simple awareness tool I have developed over the years is an activity I call Put Up Poker.

• Start by distributing 5 poker chips to each student.
• During the course of any class or any normal activity you are playing Put up Poker
• When a student utters a pu tdown, calmly and without speaking much remove one chip from their pile.
• Have a bag or box full of extra poker chips available.
• Whenever a student gives a sincere, unplanned and spontaneous compliment, put a chip on their desk.
• I generally don't comment much on what made the student lose or gain a chip unless they ask. That way it doesn't interrupt the general academic flow.
• Explain these basic principles to the students before beginning.
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Before beginning Put Up Poker or any other awareness activity it's a good idea to start with a short script like the following:

"I've observed that we use a lot of put downs in this class.I'm not sure if it's just I'm just overly sensitive or if we really have a problem. What I would like to do is an awareness activity that will measure just how often negative comments occur."

Because slurs and put downs are such a normative part of many students' experience you will most likely have to clearly define just exactly what put downs are. I also try to explain to students that good natured teasing is a normal part of living a healthy life. Teach kids to find the balance.

I generally shy away from using these types of activities as rewards or punishments. I find it's best just to build that awareness first.There will be a variety of reactions. Some students will do the reverse of your intention and immediately lose all of their chips. Others will give a bunch of false shallow compliments just to earn chips. In both case it's best to respond without emotion. A "just the facts maam" approach works best.

At the end of the day or that particular class just ask for a quick show of hands of:

• "Who has more than they started with?"
• "Who has less than they started with?"
• "Who has the same amount?"
• "Did anybody make a compliment that I didn't hear?" (if so reward that student a chip)

If you do this for awhile, perhaps a week or two, you can ask the class to agree as a group that they want to reduce or eliminate put downs. But surprisingly, just building that awareness often has an amazing effect on the emotional safety of the classroom. Peace. Jeff